Our parents are someone we turn to for support, guidance and safety. Everything that a parent does and how they do it becomes an important part of their child’s life. The way we speak to our children becomes their inner voice. So, do yourselves a big favor and never use the following five phrases when you are talking to your child. I’m from Washington, DC, and I couldn’t agree more.
- I’m disappointed in you!
Parents usually say this when they feel really bad. But, it doesn’t mean it’s ok. Parents, trying to make your kids responsible for your disappointment is something really selfish. You can be disappointed in a friend, movie, or even your country’s politics! But, you can’t be disappointed in your child. So, when your kid does something wrong, you should guide it back. Your disappointment is in your guidance, not your child. You should teach your child what they did is wrong and why.
- You are worthless!
This is the worst thing you can say to a child. When you say this, you will put your child on a never-ending journey to seek approval from the outside world. Instead of helping them to find their own worth inside, you will let them believe they have nothing inside them to be found.
- Stop crying right now!
When a kid does something “bad”, they start crying immediately. And “sometimes”, they cry for no reason. Parents, this is very important for you to remember – they have all the right in the world to express their feelings every time. By saying this phrase to your child, you are slowly programming it to suppress its emotions.
- You are not (something) enough!
“You are not enough” – when you say this to your child, you are showing them a pretty restricted image of themselves. You are implying that there is something they are lacking in order for them to do what they love or be who they want to be. Even when you are not saying that they are not enough, you are programming their mindset that way. They are enough to be themselves and they always are. Remember that!
- You are fat!
You should never (ever) say this to your kid. If you have a fat kid, they already know they’re fat. YES, they hear about it from other kids at school every single day. Home should be a safe place, not a place that they’re going to be bullied even more in. The psychologists warn that this may lead to eating disorders and an unhealthy body image without a doubt. Ladies and gentlemen, you should be very careful what you say to your children. They are the ones who will be there to take care of you when you can no longer take care of yourself.
